How's everything going on?

The mid-term holiday had passed one week and i hope everybody are enjoying themselves. In order to fully utilise your time, you must first plan all your activities properly and confirm that you are able to reap all the benefits from it. However, the most important thing is you must be happy with what you have done and don't look back. I guess i am quite satisfy with what i have been doing so far and i am enjoying it. I do really enjoy myself this holiday without any thought of studying which i consider cruel to yourself and your precious brain...haha... Well, most of my time were spend on computer games and blogging. Even i am not blogging everyday but i tried my best to post my blog as frequent as possible since i didn't have that many things to say and share with you all. Now, all i hope is that the coming week will not be a boring one to me and maybe you all too. I will certainly use up all the time i got by enjoying myself every minutes and seconds i spend. Don't worry about anything and go ahead make yourself happy during this holiday. Don't regret later. That's all for now.. Lastly, enjoy your holiday guys!!!

HOLIDAY!!!!

Leadership and myself...

I had attended a leadership course at Sunway University College on 29 of March and finally, the letter that contains the goals that i had set to change for the past two months have arrived. I was quite shocked when i found that letter because i never thought they will send it to us. Anyway, i brave myself to open up the letter and to my surprise, i found my piece of paper which i had wrote my goals on it inside the letter. When i browsed through what i had set myself to change for the past two months, i found that i did not even close to reaching one of it. How regret i am....haiz... Together with that paper, i also found a set of paper stating all our questions and answers on that day. I can't even remembered whether i had asked any questions on that very day. Never mind, i just read every questions and answers to it. I found that all the answers that referring to each particular questions were very useful and it did help me to understand myself better. Somehow, i read a few questions and answers which i personally think are very useful in upgrading and rebuilding my true self. And here are the questions and answers:

1. Why we always stuck to choose or what to study after SPM?
SPM is the "immigration counter" for all (17/18 years old) Malaysian students. It is the gateway for us to pass through, and WE MUST PASS THIS IMPORTANT GATEWAY. Our future depends on our SPM. For us to move to tertiary education, be it locally or abroad, we need good SPM results. If we do not pass our SPM, we are unable to pursue our further education.
Whatever we want to study in future depends on our SPM results, especially in English and Maths. It is the foundation on which we build our future profession. You must choose a course of study after SPM as you can only at one time study one particular course.

2. What's the pros and cons of being a perfectionist?
Advantages of being a perfectionist:
* highest/excellent quality of work
* always striving to improve
* self motivation (will not cheat on themselves)
* strive for the best, good is not good enough

Disadvantages of being a perfectionist:
* always giving stress and pressure to oneself
* it is always "Never Good Enough" attitude that may push the person to the edge and this is harmful to the person's health
* dare not to take up project or challenges (waiting to be perfect)
* procrastinating
* feeling discourage and loose confident with little mistake they made
* dwelling in the past

Knowing your strengths and weakness as a perfectionist continue to improve in your strength and watch out your weaknesses, strive to hit a balance. Don't put too much pressure and stress on yourself. Have to keep reminding yourself time and time again. The temptation will come to
get all stressed up and procrastinate as a perfectionist.

3. How do i manage my anger with certain friends and members of my society?
It is good that you are aware of your temper. Managing your anger takes a lot of self-control. Just tell yourself to stay cool and calm at all times. Remind yourself that when you angry, you will say and do things that you will regret later. Therefore, it is always wise to control one's temper.
Always remind yourself to stay cool, calm and collected at all times.

4. What is the best way to listen to others?
The best way to listen to others is to really listen with all your heart and pay 100% attention to the person talking. This means you do not just sms or take any calls, look straight at the person and do not get distracted by any external movements or noises.
Practice active listening i.e. your body language, facial expressions and feelings must be "in tune" with the person speaking.

5. How want to respect others?
In leadership... respect is to be earned. In our Asian culture, respect is given to all our leaders and people in authority. Who is not earning your respect? Do talk to a person whom you respect on the specifies of this question and then think how you would respond.

6. How to earn respect?
If you want people to respect you, you must be more competent (capable) than them. You must also be credible and consistent. The way to achieve those qualities is to make sure that what you say, what you do and what you say will do match with your action. Be true to yourself and
others. If you do that, the people who work with you will know they can depend on you. Leadership by example - say what you do and do what you say. Work harder than the rest.

7. What if I'm sensitive about what people say about me?
Be who you want to be not what others people want you to be. You have to learn to be professional and not personal. Do not let other people's judgement of you determines how you are going to behave. Do not let other people's comments affect your feelings. Rise above it move on. Be a leader.

8. How to control anger?
Always remember that if you say and do things when you are angry - you will regret it later! Therefore, when you are angry - never, never lose your temper! Always stay cool and calm. Count slowly one to ten before you respond.

9. How do i make myself better? As in lesson the burden that i go through everyday.
Always have an open mind to learn from others. Read more. Whenever you have the chance to attend a workshop - Go! Do ask for feedbacks from people that you respect. Be able to accept your weaknesses and do something about it.
Reflect on everything that you do and say everyday. Self-reflection is good for your soul - you take stock of yourself everyday and improve everyday.

That's all from me...i do hope that i can learn something from these questions and answers and strive to change myself towards a better me.

IT IS TIME TO CHANGE!

Decision...

Sometimes, i found that my life is full of making decisions and all those stuffs. The problem becomes even worse when that decision will cause changes in your life. You can't make the best moves but i think each of us have to make the right decision to continue our walk of lives. And now, i think i will have to make one of the hardest decision in my life. I can't make it as doing this requires plenty of time thinking not just for myself but my friends as well. It requires a lot of courage too when making this type of decision. I hope what decisions i have made before this will not affect much of my decision now. Even until now i don't have the courage to make the decision yet. I don't know which is the best answer and which will do harm to me or even my friends. I hope i can decide it as soon as possible to prevent anymore bad consequences. Please give me time to make this decision as i need time to figure it out which is the best answer for it. I am so sorry for any inconvenience.

Moody...

Haiz... i don't think i got mood to write my blog now. Too many feelings lingering around me. I can't decide which to write and which not to write it out. I think nowadays i am very to sensitive to something which i really can't accept it anymore. I had had enough of such feeling. I don't want to express it out anymore. You can say me stingy or whatever. I am not going to do anything about it anymore. I don't even want to mention or hear about it. Even a single fact about it. I am very tired of this kind of controlling stuff and i hope i can free myself from all these non-senses which i am talking about all this time. I think i am too much of this already, it is time for me to take a good rest this holiday and ignore whatever non-senses. I am very tired of everything, including study and all these non-senses. Please allow me to enjoy the remaining holiday i got.

I AM SICK OF THESE!!!!

The beginning of the holiday...

Well, i have consider today as the start of this year's mid-term holiday. At first, i am quite happy about it but when it comes to afternoon, i starting to get bored and feel that i am wasting a lot of time playing computer games. Since i have waited for so long for this school holiday to arrive, i must make sure that i really enjoy it and happy about it. As usual, i want everybody around me especially my closest friends to enjoy the holiday and happy with what they have done. That is one thing for sure i am not going to do this holiday is STUDY. Please, the holiday is here for you to relax your mind and don't let it suffer. You are going to depend on 'it' when you are sitting for your exam or you are doing anything else. So, let 'it' has a good rest during this two weeks long holiday and please do not ever make the condition worse by studying everyday like what you did during exam. Such action is consider cruel and torturing!! I won't tolerate with such people as they do not respect the brain as it should. They do not deserve to have a brain also. I will make sure my brain is pamper during the whole holiday by allowing it to have enough rest and not forcing it to study and memorise something. If you want your brain to listen and work for you in the best way, please do what you should to protect it from any harm. Do not ever give extreme pressure to it. Take this advice and i hope you will succeed in your life.

TAKE GOOD CARE OF YOUR BRAIN!!

Finally it has finished...

Oh, thanks God!! Finally the three weeks long diagnostic examination has come to an end. I had wished for this date to arrive since the day it started exam. I guess all of you also share the same thought as me because we all are students so we sure have some common motives in our lives that is finish the exam quick especially SPM...lol.. Anyway, this is only the diagnostic exam so there are more to come and i don't think i can manage to survive all these gruelling task or not. I hope i do because there are still many things in life that i haven't try so i want to live longer...haha..I guess this coming holidays will be quite enjoyable days to relax ourselves and free ourselves from the study of course! I hope all of you have something to do that can benefit yourself and you can gain something from it. The most important thing is you enjoy to the whole process and are happy about it.

Meanwhile, myself didn't plan much for my holidays. I just hope that i can get some good relaxing days and able to sleep soundly because during these few days i really can't sleep well maybe the exam pressure are pressing me too hard until i keep on think about it. By the way, these days are over and i am sure i must enjoy the whole holiday to release myself from these pressures. I personally think that two weeks of holiday are not enough for us to recover from the 'injuries' we sustained during the three weeks of exam. We deserve to relax more before we go back to school and start our second semester because it is our right to enjoy our teenage years. Come on, fight for our right!!

WE WANT MORE HOLIDAYS!!

Seeking for happiness...

First of all, i am writing this post because i want my friends especially my best friends to seek for their happiness. I want you all to be happy and not to suffer with me. You get what i mean? I don't want you all to be unhappy because of me. More importantly when i am down and i have no mood to talk to anyone. I do have time when i really upset and i don't want to talk to anyone even my closest friends. This doesn't mean i am angry with you but i need time to recover myself. During this time, i seriously dislike any form of distractions so please be considerate when you all see me having a bad mood. Do not ever come near me and cause any trouble because i also don't know what i am going to do to get rid of the distractions. I needed this time desperately to regain my mood and my rationality. When this is happening, i hope all of you especially my close friends not to worry about me and leave me alone until i am back on form. Please respect my decision....

Secondly, i want you all to do something that can really make youself happy. Don't care about anything, as long you think you can get happiness by doing so, go ahead and have it done. Even though by doing so can cause someone including your boyfriend/girlfriend to be unhappy, go on to do it in order to get your happiness that you are looking for. Make sure you are happy with what you have done and not regret about it. Remember this~the only person who knows you the best is yourself, so treat yourself with happiness. Nobody knows what you think if you didn't tell them. So, you are the one who knows what yourself really want and no point you suffer to make somebody happy when yourself are not happy about it. Please think wisely before making a decision so that you are satisfy and happy with it. Lastly, happiness is the key to sustain any relationship and longevity.

ALL HAIL THE HAPPINESS!!!

Not enough time...

Haiz...so many topics to study yet i have not enough time to study all. I am so regret now that i have wasted plenty of times blogging and playing computer games. Instead, I should have used the time to study. Because of this, i have not enough time to finish my revision and now i have to skip some topics just to revise the important one. How i wish i could finish all of them..haiz..Anyway, no point i regret now because i have to make use of every minutes i got carefully. Any misuse of it could lead to fatality in my life. Is it that serious??!! Na..I don't think that serious, maybe i will emo again when i get the results later. This is enough to cause my life to turn misery and hopeless.

All these will not happen if there is no examination and we can have much more freedom to do whatever we want. How good if exam doesn't exist to burden up our life and we can lead our free and easy lifestyles. Oh my, this sounds so peaceful and tranquil. I want this kind of lifestyle please....lol..I know i won't get my wish but sometime it is good to dream of it also. It can make your life happier and less tense. Just like blogging, i can voice out my expression through it and get to receive comments from all of you. It is very soothing to hear from you all because all of you are my ray of hope. I hope this ray will lead to my success and you all can share with it.

What is time?

Is time all we need?

I think friends are more important than time,

A friend in need is a friend indeed.

Another boring day....

Hmm...today i started my day when i got up around six o'clock and told myself that today is still an exam day so be prepared for 'boring~ness'. I got myself dressed up and headed to school. As usual, i saw the normal scene that you are able to see it everyday. Everybody were holding at least a book to study. The only thing special for today was not many people were doing so maybe because the Physics paper 3 start right after recess and we have the time before recess to do our revision. So, i just took out my revision book and flipped through it while waiting for the morning assembly to start. The assembly for today got a bit special than the usual one because today is Teacher's Day, so a few teachers gave their speeches from the ministry of education. Poor thing, nobody were listening to them since everybody were busy studying including myself...hehe...Half-way during the assembly, those who were sitting for the Account exam were asked to go back to class and sit for their exam.

After the assembly has finished, we went back to class and continue to do our boring 'thingy' (study). All of us were making good use of the time by studying (again)...haiz...there was only a minor group that were still relaxing and having a little chat with their friends. Time went passed slowly and Pn. Mai came into our class and asked us to do some PEKA stuff. After that, we went to see her in Physics' lab to ask some non-sense about Physics (EMF and r). After the Q&A session, we went back to our class and continue to study while waiting for recess.

Well, i spend my recess time in 'Koperasi' and have some chit-chatting with my 'yellow buddies'. We even managed to have some gossip about the teachers and exchanged the tips we got. Right after the recess, we went back to class to sit for the paper. This time, the paper is quite 'ok' since i got myself prepared before this. There were still a few questions that were tricky and confusing. Anyway, i just went on to do it and passed the paper up. I went back home and just laid down to have some quick rest before i ate my lunch. After my lunch, i online and started to write this non-sense. By the way, thanks again for reading this non-sense..lol

Just finish it quick...

Oh God, please end this wrath quick. I can't stand it any longer. Well, i am talking about the 'unsustainable' diagnostic examinations. I really tired of studying everyday and this is slowly killing me. There are still five more days to suffer before this coming to an end. Aww...please end it. The coming exams included the three branches of Science that are Biology, Chemistry and Physics which consist of three papers each. To sum it up, there are a total of nine more papers to go through. This is quite a lot though. By the way, it is my duty as a student to complete the exam but i wish i was not given this burden. I consider myself rather lucky because i have a bunch of buddies who are working hard together towards the end of this exam. Thanks you all. I am so glad that you all existed around me and help me out whenever i require your helps.

Thanks my friends...

Failure...

Hmm...i think i will fail my additional mathematics paper again. The possibility for this to happen is very high. Almost half of the the both papers i can't even understand what the questions want. For this, i just left blank all the questions that i don't know how to do. There were too many questions i have left blank until i am lost count to it...haha...I think most of my friends also screwed this paper up but i am not mentioning about the people who are too smart for add maths. I can't imagine what are stored in their brains but maybe their brains have microprocessors in it to help them to do the calculations...haha...This sounds like impossible though. Anyway, i just want to wish you all good luck for this paper and the coming papers. I have lost my hope in this exam when the ******* add maths papers appear on my desk. I HATE ADD MATHS!!! Why must we suffer to calculate all these unknowns when you might not be using it in your future life? I just can't stand it. Add maths will most probably be the 'long forgotten' in my mind when my SPM finished. Haiz...how i wish that SPM will end tomorrow.. Pleeeease....

Happy Mother's Day...

Well, this weekend all of us will celebrate the greatest day in the world that is Mother's Day. So, i want to grab this opportunity to express my deepest gratitude and thanks to my most beloved mum. I love you mum. Even though i can't afford to buy you any things, i hope u will receive my message through my success. I know every mother will like to have their children to achieve their greatest achievement in their lives. So, i think do well in my examinations especially in my SPM will be the best gift to her this year. Anyway, first i need to do well in this diagnostic examination as her appetizer. The main course is the SPM...haha..I promise you that i will do my best in my SPM.

HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!!!

Don't put the blame on the others...

Nowadays, i find myself like to blame my friends or even my beloved family members of my faults. I am really sorry but i can't really explain why i playing with this 'blaming game'. I think it is time for me to quit this game and focus on rebuilding back my true self..haha..Anyway, i do miss my old luppyzai or maybe i should describe myself as Poo Lup Meng because i only use (luppyzai) lately. Oh, the old me is just to naive and innocent..haha..i am talking about my primary years when i used to keep quiet and stayed away from any non-senses. I can't recalled back all the sweet memories but i still manage to remember part of it.

Back to this topic, there are so many blame 'flying' around these days especially in my school. More specifically-among my cooperative buddies. I hope both of these parties stop blaming each other and try to forgive one another. Why we want to waste time blaming one another when we can make good use of the time we have by fostering a better relationship. Think back properly and stop blaming please... I don't want to see the blame or clashes happening right in front of my eyes because i prefer we sit together and have a brief chat even though we have some language problem. All these have passed and no use we put the blame on the others. Why not we get back together since this is our last year in the school. I am sure all of you want to leave this school with fond memories but if this thing continue to happen, we are not going to get it. So, try to forgive. PLEASE!!!

P.s : This is just an advice. I mean no harm.

Is moral really exist??

Can anyone answer me this question? No matter you say it is exist or does not, i know that you have your reason for it. Anyway, i just want to tell you that after i took my moral exam today, i found out that moral doesn't seems to exist around us. I find that many of us study moral just because of exam and we do not really practise it. So, what is the point we push ourselves so hard to memorize all the moral values but we do not practise them in our everyday lives. Then, no point we study moral this way. Well, this is just my point of view towards this question. I mean no harm to your answer though. Even myself too indulge in this form of 'practice'...haha... That's why you can find me sometimes for being so unreasonable. It's because i don't practise the moral values that i had learnt all this time. If i have ever hurt you with my 'unreasonable' thinking, i am so sorry and please forgive me...hmm..I think i have enough for this topic. I still need to struggle to study History. Remember to give me feedback about this topic oo...

Exam day....

Well, today is still an exam day. Two days have passed since the first day of exam had started but i still have no mood to study. Haiz.... I don't expect to get excellent results but i do hope that i can pass all my papers. Even now i have no mood to write my blog with all these gloomy surroundings that cause my mood to drop tremendously. All i wish now is the exam finishes quickly to bring back the joyful me. Now, everyday i go to school the first thing i see is students holding a book revising. This is seriously BORING!!! Somehow, i still have to study, take exam and later face my results. Nothing say for today already....

It is a DISCRIMINATION!!

Now i finally understood how a person felt when he/she being discriminated because myself had undergone this situation this very day. I can tell you that this feeling is too hard to describe. It feels like something is being stroked deep into your heart. OUCH!! No wonder there are so many people out there suffering from this 'being isolated' situation just because somebody has misspoken something that causes you to feel discriminated. I really feel sympathy to all those who have been discriminated or victims of racism. Anyway, i won't state what causes me to being discriminated since this thing has passed and i have no point to bring back out this topic. All i can do now is to voice out my sadness through this blog and try to forget about it.

I hope this post can change all of you who read this post and learn to be nice to everyone even though that person is not at the same 'group' as you. Please remember this advice because you might be discriminated by somebody one day and you will feel what i am feeling now. To those who think that they have done something similar to this, you should apologise to them and remember not to repeat the same mistake again. The last thing i wanted to say here is i strongly against RACISM and DISCRIMINATION!!!! We should all live together in harmony and not discriminate each other since we all live in the same world and we must learn to tolerate each other. PEACE EVERYBODY!!

I can't do it...

Argh..my head is so painful now. I just can't stand all those history stuffs. All these had happened and it were all passed, and why are we learning about it again? Anyway, i have to accept the fact that we are required to study HISTORY. I have tried many ways to memorise all the facts but it doesn't seem to work. I must find a way to overcome this problem before it is too late. Once again, i need someones who are willing to lend me a hand to curb this problem for me.

There is another thing that i can't do it. That is, i can't fulfill my promises eventhough i really wanted to. This makes me feel very guilty and i think i have hurted many people by giving them false hopes. I am so sorry to all of you who i have hurted. I hope this apology is not too late and you will accept it. There are many reasons behind my actions for not fulfilling my promise. I hope you all can stand in my point of view and understand my condition. Somehow, i will try my best to keep my promises and not let you all down.

Am I ready??

I really can't answer this question even though it keeps on popping up in my mind. Argh..why am i suffering from this simple question that almost everyone of us can easily answer it. WHY?? Diagnostic examination is on the way yet i still in the blues. I know that i must handle this question all by myself but i can't make it. My thoughts just can't answer it for me and i hope that i can answer this as soon as possible. I have not much time left for me to think of all these things as SPM is coming quick. I can't predict what will happen to my coming examination's results but i have the power to manipulate it from good to better. Why am i not doing something to make it happen?

Time has given me plenty of chances to make it happens but i just ignore it and i think i must bear the consequences. I really can't imagine the wrath because i had betrayed the time numerous of times. I guess i still have the chances to repay back since i have this coming weekend to fulfill my promises. I hope that i can make it though. With all these pressures piling upon me, i must make sure i do not disappoint myself and others who put hopes on me.

Is this the answer for my question? I don't think so. The answer is still far from my expectation and i can hardly find it. Anyway, i will consider this as my temporary answer and i hope that it won't fails me. I told myself not to day dreaming anymore so i can put more efforts on my studies. By doing this, i think i am one step closer to my answer. I really hope that i can find this answer before i face with the misery and i seriously require helps from anyone who are willing to sacrifice his/her time to help me find the answer. Hmm...i think i am thinking too much already. I should not waste my precious time here writing all these stuff. Instead i could have found my answer if i didn't waste my time blogging here...haha..By the way, thanks for spending time reading my nonsense here..

An outing...

Hmm...maybe i should start it when i reached my destination, Time Square. Well, today is just my 'husband' (don't think of anything much) and i went out together so it won't be a big problem when it comes to buying tickets. There was a slight problem though. The queue was quite long because today is a public holiday and we already expected this situation will happen. Right after we got our tickets, i accompanied my friend to have some shopping around the place. Too bad i went back with just a few packets of chocolates while my friend bought a limited edition Coca-Cola™ bottle...haha...I really wished i could have bought some brand new clothes home but money is making a huge problem here..haiz...The temptations were just too hard to resist.

It was time for us to enjoy our movie, Iron Man. Although my friend doesn't seem to have a good impression about the show, i still managed to persuade him to see it..haha..The movie is consider a good movie to me at least. It was full of actions and humours throughout the show. I just wanted to give a little bit comment about it, because i can't really understand the electronic stuff! I think it won't be a problem for an engineer especially an electronic engineer...haha..If you prefer Spiderman or X-men type of shows, then you might like this show too. Don't take my advise for granted..haha..

When the movie finished, we both went to Borders™ to have a look for some books. We aren't looking for any books though. We were just passing our time there while waiting to go back home..haha...By the way, we really spend our time by flipping through books that we found interesting and worth reading. Finally, it was time to go back. We took LRT to Sri Petaling and from there, we went back separately.